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Not a Bottle of Rum, Rather Warm Milk and a Pair of Socks (and maybe a toothbrush)

I know it’s National Talk Like A Pirate Day (thanks to Dave Barry and Jeremy), but I am of the Red-Handed Jill kind, you know, sorting out all you ruffians and teaching things like manners, propriety, telling stories, reminding you of your mothers.

After I throw it up all over the dorm bathroom floor, just missing the place it should have gone, I remember why I don’t like rum. The sweet smell with other bitter ones reminds me, and I heave again. The tiles are the color of your pale green uniform shirt, nickname stitched above your right breast pocket. The handle on back of the stall door is shiny. To this day I can’t stand cordovan belts with nickel buckles. Dark unscrubbed crevices around the grout show me old oil mixed with dirt and pommade beneath your nails that fumble with your zipper while trying to steer the truck. Seeing the flaking paint and quickly patched places in the drywall, I feel the callouses of your palms against places that are waiting for love. My stomach twists again, just like then, only now my mouth opens wide and instead of you shushing it, I scream through the retch, and you spill out all over me.

Downtown Book Chat

It’s been a long time since I’ve done a book report.

And now as an adult, I usually read for pleasure. Judging only that

a) it was horrible, I couldn’t get past page 5 (which is very rare);

b) it was okay

c) it was wonderful, I couldn’t put it down, I hope the author writes a sequel, can’t wait for Hollyweird to destroy it on-screen.

The Sun Also Rises by Ernie, Chapters 1-7

All of the characters are believable, bu so far I don’t like any of the female characters. Lady Brett - I can only picture the face of the Brett from MatchGame…Rather.

Robert is weak, rather. Which, Ernie, I find terribly ironic considering he’s the boxing champ from college…physically strong, but weak in personality. He marries the first woman who pays him any attention. He lets Frances get away with saying anything to him, however rude. Even Jake wonders why he puts up with it.

I like Jake the best, so far, the narrator. He seems to have the most going for him - he has a job, anyway.

It is awfully easy to be hard-boiled about everything in the daytime, but at night it is another thing (last sentence of chapter 4). I just really like that line.

I also enjoyed the banter about the wine / champagne in chapter 7. I particularly agree with the count on what I expect from a wine: ”…all I want out of wines is to enjoy them.” That is probably most of these characters view on life, too - just to enjoy oneself.

Unfortunately both Jake and Robert are in love with Brett who plans to marry Michael, yet claims to NEVER write him. So it should be interesting to see how it plays out.